Some jokes I found

Some are pretty funny

Edward Cullen knows all your inside jokes.

Jasper Hale will never be a therapist. He already knows how that makes you feel.

Edward Cullen doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.

Jacob just glared at the kids dressed as vampires,he new it was wrong but he still lied and said there was no candy left!

One of the few thing Alice can’t see is Chuck Norris about to roundhouse kick her.

Jasper is sexy, too sexy for his shirt, so sexy that it hurts, that’s why he always looks like he’s in pain.

The Volturi went into hiding when they heard Chuck Norris DOES exist.

Thankx Stephenie. now i’ll never find a man.

Edward and Bella were sitting on a bench. Edward leaned over and kissed Bella she fainted he looked up at everyone including Charlie and Edward's family and said “Im sexy”

Dear Diary,
Today i made Carlisle feel like he was in love with Edward… AGAIN!!
LOL
later,
Jasper

Jacob got ran over by a reindeer walking home from Bella’s on Christmas eve.
You can say there’s no such thing as Santa, but Edward and me believe.

dear dairy,
Bella raped me today on esme isle. im scared!
Later Edward

Well, you know how alive is my favorite sister, I saw her in jaspers mind last night and he attacked me for my “emotions”!what a loser he should have known I was picturing Jacob,BELLA! I meant. Bella!
Thanks diary!
-Edward

Dear Diary
I would like to La push Jacob of a cliff,
love Edward

Emmett stood across the volvo from Edward and screamed DAM IT EDWARD STOP DAZZELING ME!!!!

Where do the Cullens go for an all day buffet?
the zoo!!!!!!!!!!!!

You know what sucks ………. vampires!!! lmao

I went to la push washingtona and all i got was this stupid imprint

http://spidurmunkey.wordpress.com/2008/07/14/twilight-jokes/

Found more

How many Twilighters does it take to screw on a light bulb?
I don't know, they're all too busy fighting over who gets to be Mrs Cullen

Edward Cullens first job was as a paperboy, there were no survivors.

The only bad thing about Edward Cullen is that there is only one! :'( lol

What happened when Emmett Cullen stubbed his toe?
He made the whole city collapse!

Rosalie Hale was told to find something just as or more beautiful then herself. She came back with a mirror!

How do you stop Jacob Black from attacking you?
You pick up a stick, throw it and yell 'fetch'!

-How do you irritate Edward Cullen?
Buy him a dog and call it Jacob!

Chuck Norris wears Alice Cullen pajamas.

Why can't Edward read Bella's mind?
There's nothing to read.

Chuck Norris can read Bella's mind.

These are good stuff. I love the Edward newspaperboy one & the Bella raping Edward in Isle Esme



¡! moved

Who is Chuck Norris? Maybe them i will actually understand the Chuck Norris jokes! LOL!

But yeah some of them are pretty funny.

he was in some tv show over here. everyone thinks he's some badass.

They are great. I actually found some of these in some avatars.

Yup. Like your avi, Lucia. I love that.

funny jokes

Bella: Your pale white and ice cold, i know what you are
Edward: Say it.......... Out loud......................SAY IT
Bella: Vanilla Ice-cream

He sure tastes like that

So… Edward Cullen…

There is one question that all the girls have been secretly dying to ask you…

Does IT sparkle?




Who needs a disco ball when you have Edward? Just take him outside and dance it up ’cause he sparkles!

magic wrote:So… Edward Cullen…

There is one question that all the girls have been secretly dying to ask you…

Does IT sparkle?




Who needs a disco ball when you have Edward? Just take him outside and dance it up ’cause he sparkles!

The pretzel sparkles, too!!!

hahahhahahahaa i had the same question about Chuck Norris but i guess i kinda know now...
and i found myself laughing at very and each and every one hahahhahahahahahah